Sound Doctrine for Women (2)
…Continued from Sound Doctrine for Women (1
In Grace & Truth 74 we considered the command of the apostle Paul that the older women in the church be teachers of good things. But who are they to teach? Answer: "the young women" (Tit. 2:4-5). Older women, take note - in all of your speech and actions, both in and outside your home, you must make yourself a pattern of holiness for the younger women. Seven instructions are given to the older women that clearly teach the duties of young women. May you be greatly encouraged by this Word of God. In an age when so many are confused about the role of a wife, God has spoken! Pay attention to what you are to be like as a young married woman. Older women are to teach the younger women the following:
1. TO LOVE THEIR HUSBANDS
What a wonderful first duty to be taught! Before the wedding the bride would laugh to be told that love is a "duty to be learned". But it is not long before many long to be taught how to love their husband above all others, above relatives, family, and even self. Why should you love your husband like this? The Bible says that it is because of the union between the husband and his wife, for they are no longer two, but one.
a) In creation, God took a part of the man, fashioned the woman, and gave her back to him to have as a part of himself (Gen.2:21-23).
b) They are united in all the law of God and of man.
c) They both choose and agreed to be man and wife, entering into a covenant relationship under God.
d) They have become one flesh in sexual union.
e) Should God bless them with children, these are the fruit of their union.
"But there is the house to look after, the food to prepare, the children to care for; I have to work, and then there are the relatives - I do not have the time or energy to love my husband as well." Young woman, what you say is true, but if you neglect this, your chief duty, your life and marriage will be a mess. You are to take more delight in your husband than in other men. You are to have an affection for him which you hold in your heart and express to him. Pray for this. Let your love begin in God first. Ask him to deepen your love for your husband and, where you are able, to help him not to sin but to do good. Study your husband and learn what pleases him; care for him, seek his comfort in health and sickness. These self-denying actions make up the true love of a wife, from which the more romantic emotions are continually get on fire. There is much written also on the love of the husband for his wife (Eph.5:22-33), out of which this response of love in the wife flows, but here you as a wife are given this duty to love your husband.
2. TO LOVE THEIR CHILDREN
This is another duty of love, one you owe to any children the Lord has given you. It is not only given to the woman, in the sense that the father has nothing to do; but while the children are young the mother's proper place of work is to be in the home, whereas the father's work is usually outside the home. This love is not just having a natural, fond affection for them, but the seeking after what is best for them. It is not giving them everything they want; but caring for their needs. This is done in the following ways:
a) It is the mother who should nurse and care for the child herself, unless her health or strength would keep her from being able to do so, or some other major obstacle should prevent her
b) The mother loves the child by teaching him about God and His Word from an early age, and by being an example as she seeks to love and obey Him in her own life.
c) The mother loves by correcting and disciplining her child when he needs it, and not letting him have his own sinful way.
d) The mother loves when she prays daily for her children.
e) A mother loves all her children from the oldest to the youngest, seeking God's grace for this, especially in the difficult stages.
3. TO BE SENSIBLE
A young woman is to be careful and moderate. This means that you will learn to control your affections and desires and rule over them with reason and sound judgment. You will seek to bring your thoughts captive to the Word of God and not to let your mind dwell on things that He forbids. This is a guarding grace for your mind, keeping it from both sinful pleasures, and excessive lawful pleasures. A young woman must learn to watch over her emotions and control her passions. She must be wise in her conduct around men, in controlling her temper and her tongue, not giving in to childish behaviour or acting in ways that draw too much attention to herself. The entire household is in problems when a woman gives into her emotions, rather than acting "sensibly".
To be continued…Sound Doctrine for Women(3)
Article edited and re-shared from Grace & Truth magazine, issue №75 (1995), Patty Owen
